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You’d think that, 13 months down the road and well after finalization, getting Joe a valid birth certificate shouldn’t still be an issue. But it is.

When we filled out the paperwork for Joe’s finalization, we completed a form for the State of Colorado’s Office of Vital Records requesting several birth certificates for Joe. For those not in the know, Joe’s original birth certificate went into a sealed file that only he can open after he’s 18. We have nothing but a Decree of Finalization to prove that Joe exists. And that’s really beginning to be a problem.

Joe needs a social security number (which requires his birth certificate) in order that we may do such basic things as file our 2007 taxes* and switch Joe’s health insurance (again, a long story for another post). But we’d also like to set up a 528 education fund among other things. It’s amazing how ham-stringed we are without this stupid piece of paper. (You may remember from a previous post that Joe cannot fly as a lap infant on Southwest because he doesn’t have a birth certificate.)

Our check to Vital Records was finally cashed in late May. A few days ago, I got a bit worried and decided to do some follow up. Several unreturned phone calls and emails later, I still had nothing, so I hoofed it — Joe in tow — to Colorado’s vital records office. After spending the better part of the day there with a very messy and fussy Joe, I discovered that Colorado can’t reissue Joe’s birth certificates because he wasn’t born in Colorado. As I stood there fuming and nearly in tears, ready to curse our social worker and agency to very bad places for screwing it all up again, it hit me — sort of like a pie in the face — that this could very well be my oversight. The idea that we’d have to deal with another state just never crossed our minds. I just presumed that Colorado would issue Joe’s new birth certificate the same way they would in the case of international adoption (about which we were better informed). But that’s not how it works. What really happens is that Colorado forwards all of the submitted paperwork to the child’s state of birth. Then that vital records office re-issues the new birth certificates. A light bulb in my momma brain finally turned on. Ohhhh…which quickly turned into “oh no.”

The local folks kindly gave me the general number for the out-of-state office I needed to call. I made sure my blood-sugar levels were within the normal range and dialed. It took a few hours and a couple of calls to reach the right person, and I was floored by even more bad news: Joe’s state of birth was six months — months — behind in certificate processing. We could expect ours in late November as they had only received the paperwork from Colorado in late May. I almost didn’t know what to say. Almost.

As the repercussions of this news swirled in my brain, I took a deep breath. I wasn’t about to give up. There had to be another way. We were told that we could reapply via overnight mail, which takes about 10 days, but we’d have to send a new check, a certified copy of his finalization decree (of which we have only one), and an application. A prepaid return envelope would ensure rapid return. I was having a difficult time understanding how — if they had our paperwork, and I had a returned check — why they couldn’t just process it quickly given our circumstances. I offered to pay extra for the rush, but that wasn’t an option. So, I started the sob story — Joe couldn’t get health insurance, the IRS will only give us until October — then I resorted to good old-fashioned begging.

The kind kind lady on the other end of the phone finally gave in, especially when I explained that the cashed check was a rather hefty amount because we paid Colorado’s rates (and someone miscalculated, so we ended up sending extra funds too). She offered to expedite Joe’s birth certificates if we overnighted a request explaining our conversation along with a copy of the certified decree. We could send a prepaid envelope for the return or rely on regular mail, our choice. $35 and a day later, the weight of the world has started to lift from my shoulders. I just got a call telling me that Joe’s birth certificates are “in the mail.” The second they arrive, I’ll do the happy dance, then do the whole rigmarole again over at the social security office. Wish me luck and the ability to keep my death grip on sanity.

*We could have applied for an ATIN (Adoptee Taxpayer Identification Number), but they take 4-8 weeks to process; the ATIN only works for taxes (and you still can’t take the dependent credit without a social security number). Unfortunately, I didn’t figure this out until April 14th and we were so close to finalization that I figured a few extra weeks wouldn’t matter while we waited for birth certificates and Joe’s social security card.

Joe’s mobility is starting to get the better of us. Joe can run. He likes to be free of the confines of Bjorn and stroller and be on his own. He refuses to hold one of our hands. And he’s usually headed — fast — for something to shove into his mouth. Or straight off the edge of a stairway. He’s definitely “that kid” who will, without missing a beat, run off the edge of a pier (or a cliff, God help me). So, Dan’s comic yesterday was rather apropos.

After several attempts to hurl himself off the edge of our bed (he’s fearless) — and several “split seconds” when Joe dashed through an open gate in the house to an off-limits room — I decided that we probably couldn’t get far out of doors unless we kept Joe on a short leash, literally. Dan requested that we at least do the “cute backpack thing.” So I bought Joe a teddy backpack with a “tail” that attached to my wrist. Joe and I tried it at the zoo yesterday.

After he decided that all the scary people and “new” surrounds were okay (despite the fact that he’s been to the zoo a thousand times), Joe wandered around, but not far from me. We probably didn’t need the harness that day, though I suspect if I had let him loose without it, he would have been off like Speedy Gonzales. Did I mention that he’s a sneaky little thing too?

I knew when I decided to get a harness that I’d have to endure everyone else’s opinions. As we walked through the zoo, we did receive several comments. Most were along the lines of “hey, that’s neat!” or “Zack needs one of those!” My favorite peanut gallery comment, however, came out of the mouth of a babe: “look mommy, that baby has a leash.” I smirked, and walked on.

Some people may be offended by the concept of “leashing” a child. I did my best to choose a system that was as discreet as possible…mainly for our own sensibilities. But, to those folks who take issue with our decision, I will choke back the desire to say “bite me!” and instead say this: it really depends on the kid. My kid’s a runner. Maybe your kid isn’t. But if he was, maybe you’d think twice? After all, you care enough to keep your dog from running into the street so that he won’t get hit by a car. Don’t you love your child as much? I do.

Postscript: OK, after I reread this, I realized how defensive I was with this post. So far, we’re received nothing but really positive and supportive comments about our decision to harness Joe. (On the other hand, we’ve used it once in public.) And on an unrelated note, I’ve been getting a lot more really positive smiles and comments about Joe (and us as a family) in general lately from all sorts of people. Joe and I were just in Walmart this afternoon and I had at least one AA man and four AA women stop and comment about how cute Joe was. (Actually, I think the guy was flirting with me, which I found really flattering; he was cute!) Maybe it helped that I actually did Joe’s hair before we left the house, so he didn’t have bedhead!

I’m not sure why I’ve been so hesitant to post news and tidbits of information lately. Maybe it’s because I’ve been lousy about taking pictures of anything except stuff I’ve been posting to Craigslist. (We’re having a huge house clean out and a yard/block sale this weekend.*) I guess I’m feeling guilty that I don’t keep a camera always in hand when chasing around the amazing Joseph, our own little Houdini, who manages to escape most barriers and get into everything. But he’s also doing some pretty cool new things. I have no new pictures today, but I do have a couple of stories to share. Kind of like the difference between watching something on TV and listening on the radio, I guess. The radio can still be entertaining.

The big new thing for me is that Joseph is putting things INTO other things. Until this week, Dan always called Joe a master of entropy. He’d empty a wagon, bucket, or basket full of anything. But putting them back in? No way. If we put them back in, he’d give us a look as if he was morally offended, then frantically throw everything out again. I had horrible visions of life in a disaster zone where my kid would never clean up anything. But a few days ago, I found my Crocs (that I had taken off and left in Joe’s playroom) inside his Megablocks wagon. Joe had been in the playroom for at least 10 minutes while I “rested my eyes” on the adjacent couch. I was listening to him bang and throw this and that and expected to open my eyes to the usual disaster area. But it was tidy — I mean tidy – when I looked up. There were a couple of small toys tossed over the gate, but otherwise all the blocks, Weebles, miscellaneous toys (and my shoes) were piled into some container. I beamed. I was one proud mommy. Now if I can only convince him that stacking the blocks is a good thing…

The other kind of funny and interesting new thing that Joe is doing is walking backwards. Yes, backwards! And he knows that it’s clever because he’s constantly checking to see if we’re watching him while he does it. He’s pretty good at it, but he does end up going in circles most of the time. This morning, he started windmilling his arms frantically while he walked backwards. And, no, he wasn’t losing his balance. What a little show off! I so wish we could capture that on video. Dan’s looking into a little pocket video camera good for web-only video. Maybe that will be a good option for us for now.

Joe went in for his 12-month doctor’s visit on Wednesday. The doctor was quite impressed at his physical, social, and verbal development. Woo hoo!

Joe is right on target for growth, weighing in at 22 lbs and exactly 30 inches tall. Joe is at the upper end (and growing out of some) of his 12-month-sized clothes; he’s already started wearing 18-month-sized clothes. He wears a size 5 toddler shoe (tightly, we just tried on a pair of size 6 sneakers and they have just a little growing room). He wears a size 4 diaper.

The doctor thought Joe was well-behaved and good natured (which we already knew) and quite social for his age. Joe didn’t fight the doctor’s examination as we (and the doctor) had expected (but I have to give credit to Dr. Rich, who is an angel with the little ones). Joe only cried a short while at the end of the visit after four immunizations and two blood tests and quieted down almost immediately once he got his binky.

The fact that Joe is walking, and walking well, was apparently quite impressive. We can expect Joe to toddle for quite awhile longer. The doctor reassured me when I made a joking comment about getting Joe an inflatable sumo suit that the young human skull makes a fine helmet for everyday bumps and bruises. So no baby bubble for now, but I’m not ruling it out. Ha!

On a cognitive level, Joe is doing quite well and starting to respond to verbal cues (e.g., follow our commands), like “go get the ball” and “lay your head on the bed; it’s nap time.” Joe’s verbal development is just fine: he says repetitive phonemes, “dadada” “nanana,” just started “mamama,” and is also combining multiple phonemes. He’s also trying to mimic/repeat some things we say. And he’s starting to say “Dada” when Dan is around, though we’re not convinced he associates meaning with it yet. Joe also uses two signs: “more” and “change” (he likes a dry, clean diaper). Unfortunately, in the past week or so, Joe has also figured out how to express “no” by shaking his head back-and-forth. It’s mostly a game. At least he’s not saying it constantly, but I’m sure that day will come. Oh, and Joe is also whistling by pursing his lips and breathing heavy.

Dr. Rich did comment that Joe was very active and functioned “at a high rpm.” In fact, Joe was moving non-stop during the visit, playing with tongue depressors, tearing up magazines and books, and running back and forth in the exam room. He only stopped (or slowed down) when Dan or I held him. The doctor also commented that the speed with which Joe moves must require incredible childproofing in our house. Ha! Now we don’t feel so bad about corralling Joe in specific rooms. The doctor seemed impressed that we had the stamina and energy to keep up with him, but didn’t think anything was unusual in Joe’s behavior. Just a (high energy) boy.

It was good to hear from the doctor that Joe’s skin looked really good. I recently switched from petrolatum (aka “Vaseline or, in our case, Aquaphor) to a more natural solution for Joe’s head-to-toe eczema (raw/unrefined shea butter and we’re also trying a shea butter/coconut oil/kokum butter concoction). It takes a little extra work reapplying multiple times a day, but I feel better about using a non-chemical option, at least until Joe goes to school.

Now we need to transition Joe to cow’s milk and get him off the bottle. I’m a little worried about the milk since Joe had so much trouble finding a formula that didn’t upset his digestive system. The doctor didn’t seem worried and suggested soy as an option if we run into problems with regular milk. Once again, Dr. Rich did gently encourage us to “find a week” to work on Joe’s sleep patterns. (Joe gets up several times a night, and often ends up in our bed in the wee hours of the morning.) The problem is primarily me; I just can’t stand letting him cry, both because it’s wrenching and because I can’t sleep through it. I might have to suck it up and put in those ear plugs.

They say time flies, and it does. Joe turned one year old this Memorial Day weekend. I still can’t believe it.

Since we just had his finalization celebration and the greater fam wasn’t planning to visit, we opted to have a small, casual celebration with just the four of us (including Noni P). We went out to lunch. The waitstaff sang “happy birthday” to Joe with a lighted candle on a plate and scared the bejeepers out of him. (Note to self: no loud singing for first birthdays.)

Why the candle and no cake? Uncompromising parents that we are, we opted for a sugar-free “cake,” and we decided to spare the poor folks at the restaurant from a 1-year-old-birthday-cake mess, so we took the celebration to Noni P’s place, laid out a tablecloth (we forgot his booster seat with tray), and sat Joe on the floor with his not-so-sugary delight. The (cup)cake was a sugar-free banana cake recipe that I amended with extra fruit/moisture. More of a banana bread, but not too bad. I did splurge by adding mini chocolate chips (just a few) and covered the whole thing in light whipping cream and chopped strawberries.

I don’t think it would have mattered if the cake was all sugar, Joe just wasn’t all that interested. He got more joy out of the disposable tablecloth we laid on the floor. Noni P did encourage him to try a bite. He seemed to enjoy the whipped cream and strawberries, and kept going back for more. I think she snuck in some super yummy (read: sugary) ice cream, but that’s ok. In the end, though, Joe just didn’t want to indulge us with a cake-in-the-face scenario. He was far too busy running around the sunroom in circles trying to destroy anything and everything he could.

We seriously need to get a video camera. These photos just don’t capture a 1-year-old windmilling his arms while running (and wobbling and stumbling and righting himself and eventually falling).

Ducky 2 arrived in the mail last week. I was starting to think that Joe didn’t miss Ducky after all, but once he laid eyes on the soft furry yellow critter, he lit up. Ducky hasn’t left Joe’s side since his “reappearance.” Now, instead of just taking Ducky to bed, Joe looks for Ducky during the day and drags the thing around as much as we let him.

Here are a couple of photos of Joe with Ducky. In the photo on the left, Joe is driving his “bumper car” while holding Ducky in his mouth (he also chews on Ducky in lieu of his binky). In the photo on the right, Joe is hiding from me by covering his face with Ducky. He also does this when he’s tired and wants to go to sleep.

Every time we travel, something gets left behind or damaged beyond repair: Dan’s prescription sunglasses in Cape Cod, Dan’s new Crocs in Oklahoma, my prescription sunglasses in California; the list goes on, and on, and on…

Our most recent loss was a real tragedy: Joe’s duck blankie. He normally doesn’t sleep without it. It was definitely on the road to woobie-dom and in need of a “vacation” (read: wash). But “Ducky” really was his favorite.

Joe is actually doing okay, all things considered, and we’ve distracted him with other blankies and stuffed animals. Thankfully, after much internet searching, I found a replacement, which is on the way priority mail. It will hopefully fit the bill (no pun intended).

I’m almost wondering if I should order an extra (or two or three). On the other hand, he’ll soon be able to memorize every smudge, mark, and blemish, so I’m not sure if that’s the best solution. But the panic I felt upon realizing that Ducky was gone was quite real, and it made me wonder what other folks do about baby’s favorite animal or woobie. Any suggestions?

Wow. My first Mother’s Day. Me. I’m a mom. And I love it…even if my first was a bit impromptu.

Honestly, Dan and I both sort of forgot. We were in Seattle most of the week and flew home late on Saturday night. We knew we wanted to spend Mother’s Day with Noni P, but the day sort of creeped up on us and we didn’t have plans as of this morning.

Dan took care of Joe and let me sleep in, which was divine. When I did finally get up, we scheduled a time to pick up Noni P for lunch, then made a few phone calls. Luck was on our side and we were able to score a last-minute reservation at The Fort in Morrison for their all-day brunch.

Our reservation was later in the day, so we took a drive to Red Rocks first and had a stroll around there. What a perfect day for the trip! The sky was clear enough to see to the airport and it was a lovely 80 degrees (according to one blinking sign in Lakewood). We didn’t realize that this was Noni P’s first trip to Red Rocks; she just loved it and that made the day even more awesome.

We arrived at The Fort about a half-hour early — starving, but hopeful — and they sat us right away. Their brunch spread was, well, one word: YUM. And the good stuff was surprising: perfect asparagus, divine fresh pineapple, and the sweetest of shrimp. They also had quail, bison sausage, and the typical (but not typical tasting) brunch fare. Just thinking about it makes my mouth water. Mmmm mmmm. I really wish I had taken my “buffet bag” to sneak home a few extra goodies…

It’s wonderful being close to family for holidays and special occasions. Having Noni P in town for this past few weeks has been an utter delight and now we just can’t wait until Germom gets here too. Anyone else considering a relocation? We’d love to have you nearby!

Last Tuesday, Dan flew to Seattle on business. Joe and I joined him on Wednesday despite the fact that I had been feeling pretty lousy since the past weekend. (Right now Tuesdays are our only “nanny” days and therefore the only days I can work.)

Getting to the airport was a little challenging. (I really need to relearn how to pack light. I used to be so good at it.) Thankfully we discovered that we live all of 5 minutes from a major RTD transfer station with a direct bus to the airport. Faster, easier, cheaper. Can’t beat that. (A great option for visitors too…hint hint.)

Joe, as usual, was an angel on the plane and was zonked out before we got off the ground. Ditto the return trip, despite the brood of screamers behind us.

The trip was a nice getaway even if I was laid out in the hotel room the first couple of days. We still had the chance to order terrible (and terribly overpriced) room service food and watch Lost.

When I did feel better, we strolled the waterfront and compared dive fish-and-chips joints. (Yeah, those sushi bar plans flew out the window when we realized how difficult it would be to take Joe into a nice restaurant.) We took the obligatory (and fun) jaunt through Pikes Place Market and watched the fish throwers. We walked around the grounds by the Space Needle. Joe was pretty active and wanted to push the stroller anytime we weren’t en route somewhere, so we tried to indulge him as much as possible.

On Saturday, we stumbled across a great “Spirit of West Africa” event at the Seattle Center. Joe was absolutely captivated by the Nigerian drummers and stood on Dan’s lap — dancing and clapping — for a good 20 minutes. Anyone with boys knows how rare it is for an 11-month-old to do *anything* for 20 minutes straight, so now I’m absolutely convinced that we need to start taking Joe to music classes…and soon.

Overall, a good trip. I’m just not sure Joe is going to make it until age 2 as a “lap infant.” He’s going to need his own seat soon. Man, that kid weighs a ton!

A random aside: I’ve traveled to Seattle in the past and really loved it. But if this had been my first trip, I’d be singing a different tune. I’m not sure if this trip was tainted by my lousy disposition since I was under the weather or if we had bad people karma or if the ever-present downtown construction had everyone’s panties twisted in a wad or what. Folks were generally rude and grumpy…locals and tourists alike. There were several instances where people completely ignored me visibly struggling with luggage, strollers, and doors. No one offered help except one guy walking into the grocery store opened the door for me and the paid staff at the hotel we stayed at did too. (Other people cut me off and would get in my way as I was trying to push the door open and get the stroller through at the same time. Incredible.) I had a really bad experience with the shuttle driver from the airport. (I should file a complaint with Grey Line, but probably won’t; the driver on the way back to the airport was really nice.) I hesitate to say that the transracial nature of our family had anything to do with it given the diversity and liberalism in Seattle, but we did get an unusual number of scowls.

Little man Joe is walking most of the time that he’s on the loose. Up until now, he made attempts to walk a few steps (his max has been about 22 steps) and then crawled the rest of the way at super speed. Dan and I could hardly keep up with him when he was on all fours.

Yesterday that balance shifted in favor of walking. I wasn’t feeling too hot and Joe was getting bored with the walker. So, I brought him in our room, made sure it was safe, and set him standing on the ground while I laid on the bed to sooth my upset stomach. Joe stayed upright, wobbled a bit, took a step, and grinned. Then off he went. Walking like a drunk, but walking. And he really didn’t stop. If he was wobbly, he’d just pause, teeter forwards and backwards until he stayed himself, then continue to move along. When he fell, he simply stood up on the spot, regained his balance, and kept on going. It seemed as if only as a last resort he’d crawl a few feet to the nearest handhold, heave himself up, and then off he’d go again.

Joe is now able to turn in a different direction while walking, bend over to pick up something then stand up again, and pull, throw, and make a general mess of things all in the upright position. I’m still not sure whether to be excited at this new development or terrified about what’s to come as his mobility and personality develop in sync. For example, the door to our closet doesn’t latch and, since Joe has an infatuation with doors, he made a beeline for the only door that he could play with. Open. Shut. Open. Shut. Open. Shut. Joe teetered the arc of the door this way and that, and was having a ball. It didn’t take him long, however, to find more entertainment inside the closet. Over the weekend, we installed a shelving system and organized our bazillions of pairs of shoes (yes, Dan has as many or more than I do, even if they are primarily Crocs). Within seconds, Joe had every shoe from knee-height down (translate=my shoes) strewn across the closet floor. I pried away a sandal he decided to chew on, cleaned up the mess, shut the door as much as I could, and tried to distract him. Not a half-hour later, he rediscovered the shoes again and thought that tossing them around the closet was a real riot. I finally learned that there was no need to put them away again unless I was certain he was done playing that game. Not a big deal, but also probably only the tip of the wild man iceberg.

What really has me nervous is tomorrow. We’re flying again. Alone. Dan left for Seattle today; Joe and I will join him tomorrow. We’re staying on the 19th floor and our room has a balcony. Talk about nerve wracking experiments in parenting. I’m keeping the kid strapped to my chest with the Baby Bjorn carrier for the rest of the week!

We just realized that you can order photo quality prints for pickup at Target stores from the Flickr website. Simply click on the photo bar in our blog, which will take you to our Flickr photo site. Then click on the individual photo and let it load so that it’s the only one on the page. (If you don’t already have a Flickr account, you’ll have to sign up for one to complete the rest of the steps.) Once the photo is loaded AND you’re logged in to your Flickr account, click on the words “Prints and more” and add the quantity and size to your shopping cart. At check out, you can choose between mail delivery or Target store pickup. Cool huh?

It’s over. It’s just beginning. It’s official. However you slice and dice it, it’s wonderful.

Today was our day in court. We set our alarms to get up at the crack of dawn and get ready for the big day. Joe looked super spiffy in his new “Bagger Vance” duds. (I couldn’t resist, even if white pants are a foolish option for a crawling — and walking — boy.) We left early, making sure we arrived at least an hour before our appointment. Grandma Debbie and Granddad Bill met us at the courthouse. (They flew in late last night.) We were all pretty calm, even though our social worker arrived just before they let us all in the courtroom. It helped that the court officials like adoption hearings, the “fun” part of their job, so they really made us feel comfortable.

There were six adoption hearings during our time slot. We all went into the courtroom together (no one objected, an option they gave us). Dan, Joseph, and I were called up second on the docket. The judged asked Dan and I a few questions, we answered, and midway through the questions, the judge gave Joe a foam gavel to play with (to stop Joe from beating on the table with his hands — it worked). The judge pronounced the adoption final and that was that. Since cameras were allowed, we took a couple of photos with the judge (sorry, they ended up blurry), then we followed our social worker to the clerk’s office to get the paperwork certified.

The whole process took maybe a half-hour. We almost didn’t believe it: we had finally jumped through the last and final hoop. We’re his. He’s ours. The family we’ve become in our hearts, minds, and souls is now official on paper too. Gotcha!

Joe took his first steps today. Woo hoo! (Or oh no…I’m not sure.) Dan is particularly proud of the fact that his son took his first steps in a library. We made a pit stop at Dan’s work tonight on our way to Noni P’s new apartment. Joe was leaning on a chair while holding a toy that he didn’t want to let go of. He stood and balanced and Dan moved the chair away. Joe had to take four steps, unassisted, to reach the chair. We repeated this little act several times to make sure it wasn’t a fluke. Pretty cool. [ Update from Dan: here's a bad pic from my cell phone, a few minutes after the "First Four". Yes, libraries ARE incredible places for learning and development...and no, Joe is NOT running from the Arnold Schwarzenegger ( a la Terminator) looking health model! ]

A few weeks ago, I wanted Joe to get a professional barber cut to “clean up” my clip job before our photo shoot. Dan was skeptical, but took him in. There was a slight misunderstanding at the barber shop and Joe’s beautiful little starter ‘fro was shorn down to 3/16″. I screamed when the boys walked into the house. Then I cried and we both moped around the rest of the day. On the plus side, it was a good haircut. It helps that Joe is a cutie patootie and has a nicely shaped head. The good news is that hair grows. The bad news is that we don’t want to wait. This photo was taken on March 25th, the day Joe got his head shaved. We learned some interesting things that day, like the fact that most AA kids don’t get first haircuts until age 2 (according to the barber, though why he waited to tell Dan that until after the haircut, I’m not sure). Well, one lesson learned: no more haircuts for Joe. We’re goin’ natural. I think. Depends on his hair texture, which seems to be straight/wavy more than kinky/curly. It’s already almost 3/4″ long and still pretty straight. I found a nearby beauty shop familiar with adoptive families asking the obvious questions about AA hair, so I might head over there tomorrow.

Joe seems to get heavier and heavier, despite the fact that he isn’t getting any longer and not really any wider. He’s just dense, I guess. Our little brick. The little man is still in a size 12 months in most quality clothes, but can fit into smallish 18-month sizes too. He has long arms and not so long legs.

What surprised us most recently was the size of his (not so) little Flintstone feet. You see, the weed is learning how to walk, so we figured that it’s time for Momma-the-tightwad to suck it up at the register and buy the kid some quality shoes. Given my feet issues (mainly, the almost annual spraining and breaking of my left foot because I so easily trip over flat ground), shoes are the one thing that I always splurge on for the family. So, we went to Nordstrom and had Joseph’s feet measured. I was surprised that he came in at a size 4-1/2, which explains the difficulty we were having getting those size 4 shoes on him (oops). I should have known…I’ve been buying him 2T socks…

It’s not easy to find soft-soled shoes for beginning walkers in a size 5 (the size they recommended since half-sizes are hard to find in most brands, and he needed growing room anyhow). Joe’s chubby ankles won’t do well with Robeez (elastic at the ankle), so we’ve been keeping him in gripper socks in the house. But we really needed shoes for the outdoors, since he’s always wanting to be on the ground (to practice those walking skills). We found one brand we love: See Kai Run, my absolute most favorite shoes out there. I don’t think we’ll buy another brand for quite awhile. The quality is awesome and the styles can’t be beat. During that same shopping trip, I stumbled across the most adorable orange and yellow shoes. They look great with all of  Joe’s bright-colored outfits.  Nordys also has an awesome pair of kelly green  shoes that are next on our list of must-haves. Check these out!

OK, back to the update: Joseph now has 4 teeth, two on the bottom (center) and two eye teeth on the top (the left one is still struggling to break through, but you can see it). He climbs and walks (holding on to things) like crazy and crawls at the speed of light. We do use a walker under close supervision, though he’s starting to be a terror, always operating at “rabbit” speed (for those of you who don’t know electric carts, that’s the fast setting). He loves to run into us at full speed. We’re getting used to wearing shoes in the house just to protect ourselves. No doubt Joe will be upright on his own in no time. We just bought two more gates and started the official cabinet babyproofing.

We still have to watch Joe like a hawk (not that we wouldn’t) because he puts EVERYTHING in his mouth. He’s very attached to his binky. His favorite oral fixation is paper (he’s already “eaten” several baby board books, so we have to stick with the cloth ones for now). And he’s getting darned good at clenching his jaws to avoid a finger swipe to clear his mouth. He does the same with food when he doesn’t want to eat. Over the past few weeks, he’s been refusing solids a lot. He must be feeling better, because he ate like a horse today. We suspect it’s a combination of asserting independence and having sore gums, and perhaps growth patterns. Joe seems to enjoy feeding himself finger foods, but hates most veggies and has finally figured out how to spit out what he doesn’t like. He lets us know when he’s done or if we give him something he doesn’t want: he simply picks it up and throws it on the floor. At least the hardwoods can handle it.

Given the craziness, Joe’s schedule has been out of whack, especially with the ongoing teething. We go through Tylenol like it’s water. Not my first choice of remedies, but he really complains without it. Literally. He’ll moan and “chastise” me and get all dramatic and start biting on everything (including me) without meds. Rumor has it that adults couldn’t stand the pain of teething, so I’m giving the kid some slack and giving in to the meds. Besides, the doctor gave me the thumbs up.

Joe’s pretty restless at night, even after a long, hard day on the playground. Sleep issues are probably our number one concern. We’ve been trying everything, but my nerves are already so frayed that I don’t have much patience for the nightly screaming that accompanies bedtime (and Dan doesn’t hear it, so I can’t put the earplugs in). Lately we’ve been letting Joe fall asleep in our bed and moving him to his crib. Then I have to get up every couple of hours to coax him back to sleep (usually a binky and a quick backrub does the trick). I’m hoping that my nerves will calm down in time and I’ll be able to stick to the routine. I just can’t stand listening to him cry. I still think our comfortable bed might have something to do with his dislike of bedtime, so the second we can safely give him a softer mattress, we will. In the meantime, Joseph must go to sleep with “duckie,” his yellow mini blankie (it has a duck head and a small square of plush blanket) and, of course, his binky (though he’s less selective there; any binky will do).

Finally, on the development front, Joe is really starting to understand more and communicate in his own way. He’s always been chatty, even if these days he’s still stuck on “dadadadadadada” in varying inflections and the occasional “nananana” or “babababa” (no “mamamama” yet).  We weren’t consistent with sign language so he’s not really signing (except “more,” we think), but today he waved when he heard folks say “bye.” That was a first! (We say good-bye and try to get him to wave every morning when Daddy leaves for work.)

We’ve set up a playroom in the front sunroom where Joe can go crazy with his toys. He mainly likes to hold (and suck on) and walk around with a single megablock (he’ll throw the big ones with multiple connectors), empty all of the megablocks out of the wagon, or throw them across the room. He especially likes the black one, but the purple or blue one will do in a pinch. He loves pushing his walking car back and forth across the carpet, running into a wall, and demanding help to turn. He also enjoys “playing” his piano and turning the pages of the music book (which changes the song on the piano). He’s quite active and physical and, at times, has a short attention span. Definitely all boy.

Joe has been increasingly testing his boundaries and understands “no” even if he primarily grins in response. We’re well aware that we’re facing a delicate time in asserting who’s boss and need to be serious and consistent. It’s just that he’s so darned cute even when he’s pissing us off, it’s hard not to laugh at his devilish antics!

Sorry, I haven’t posted lately, folks. April is crazy busy with Joe and I traveling, Noni P moving out here, Joe’s finalization happening at the end of this month (woo hoo!), trying to figure out how to file a tax extension (yuck), and my ever-hectic work schedule despite reduced childcare availability. Oh, and did I mention that one cranky teething active boy isn’t sleeping so well at night?

I finally took a breather today (a “breather” being an 8-hour work day while Joe is with the nanny) only to realize (aka “freak out”) that neither Joe nor I had confirmations of new healthcare coverage after our group insurance runs out at the end of April. So that Joe could keep his same doctor (or at least have flexibility with finding a new one), I applied for Colorado-mandated “high risk” insurance for him in mid-March. Then I applied for Kaiser for myself around the first of April.  See why here.  Say what you want, but I like Kaiser; I’ve had good experiences in both California and Colorado with Kaiser, and I’m relatively healthy, so I figured it was a good bet for me.  Fingers and toes were crossed that they wouldn’t reject me again.

Today I made contact with both insurers. Not an easy task for the not-so-persistent (aka non-squeeky). I was clearly exasperated and at wit’s end. It must have shown because both companies put our applications through speedily and gave us answers today — and not the answers I was expecting! Kaiser approved me in writing and I have a verbal confirmation that Joe’s insurance was also approved (cross your fingers that I get something in writing quickly).

Can I get a collective “whew!”? If we hadn’t qualified for these plans, our insurance costs would have been two to three times what we’re going to pay, which isn’t chump change, let me tell you.

On another health note, Dan’s back is still in pretty bad shape. Actually, it’s his leg that is bothered now (bulging disc is pressing on a nerve that runs through his leg). He’s having a pretty tough time saying “no” to basic things like bending over, picking things up (like our ever-expanding Joe), and generally doing anything but relaxing. He’s still in physical therapy and his specialist thinks he might be a candidate for a steroid (injection?) therapy.

Dan got his MRI results back. He has a textbook case of a herniated (bulging) disc and needs only physical therapy, which he’s already started with a back specialist. (The first round of physical therapy wasn’t with a back person, so we’re hoping that this second round will be more successful.) The important thing is that he needs to avoid bending (hard to do) and lifting (including Joe) until the disc heals. Dan’s had a hard time not working on the house. It’s been a good lesson in patience for all of us!

Joseph and I are headed to the Bay Area to help Noni P pack up her stuff for the big move to Colorado. Woo hoo! (Dan has a crazy busy work schedule, and is in the middle of physical therapy, so he can’t go.) We decided to extend the trip and stay with Dan’s folks so that I could work on campus for a couple of days (for those who don’t know, I work at Cal, remotely of course) and let Joe get in a good visit with the grandfolks.

I had an interesting booking experience. I was committed to not fly on United (I explain why below) and I found a killer deal on Southwest Airlines. I booked it and then called in to add Joe as a lap infant to my ticket as I’ve done for all previous flights. I was floored when I was informed that I needed to arrive “early,” stand in line at the ticket counter, and fill out a triplicate form. There was no way around this. I would also need Joe’s birth certificate. I tried to explain that Joe was in the middle of an adoption and his birth records are sealed; we couldn’t bring a birth certificate as we had no access. The best I could do was bring a court order giving us custody, but Joseph’s name wasn’t on the paperwork. There was some confusion about whether or not his shot records might suffice.

I asked again and again why this was necessary since every other airline only requests a name and birthdate over the phone, then allows you to print out a boarding document online and go directly to the gate. Southwest officials, including a supervisor, indicated that this was their policy, a security procedure, to account for everyone on the plane. I declared that the entire process was ridiculous, archaic, and family unfriendly. They offered to refund the ticket and I took them up on it.

After our last experience with United (read my original post from September below), I booked a flight on Frontier, which has the most family-friendly ticketing policy I’ve found to date. They actually have a lap infant selection for their online booking system, so I was able to book Joe (for free) at the same time I booked my flight. I called in just to be sure. They said as long as there wasn’t a question about his age (under 2), then we wouldn’t need any additional documentation. His boarding pass would print out with mine, which would get us through security, then we could proceed directly to the gate. The extra $30 fare was worth it. And the flight times were much better for Joe’s schedule. We leave on Wednesday!

The truth about our last flight experience.

I didn’t post the following excerpt last September because I didn’t want to rant at the time. But given our recent booking experience, I thought it might serve as a bit of humor and a warning for parents not used to traveling with kids in tow:

September 5, 2007, Denver, CO — Since baby Joe is a seasoned traveler, another plane ride to California was as easy as pie over Labor Day weekend. At least for Joe. Mommy and Daddy were a bit more frazzled. First the shuttle from the parking lot nearly side-swiped our car, then the same shuttle driver ignored Dan and his 6 bags while I got on the shuttle. When ol’ Jesus tried to tell Dan he’d have to take another shuttle, that didn’t go over so well. Let’s just say that Dan got on board with our luggage. And we all made it to the terminal just fine, even Jesus. Security was a breeze.

At the gate, we went to board and were told to wait (we had seating number 4). I knew that United had changed its policy about families with small children, but the gate attendant on our last flight let us pre-board. She must have been sympathetic to first time traveling parents. Not this time. No siree. You see, United no longer allows families with small children to pre-board. Nope. Those first-class and priority members need to sit on a hot plane for 25 minutes while the families struggle with carseats and strollers and diaper bags, not to mention the fussy kids. Um hm. That makes sense. We were told that there are too many families with small children who now travel to allow them any kind of special preference. But I squeeked loud enough in front of everyone that she let us on after the first boarding.

The cherry on top? The flight wasn’t full, so the gate attendant told us to go ahead and take the carseat on board and use either of the middle seats in our row. (Dan and I both wanted aisle seats, so we got them in the same row, but across the aisle.) Then we realized that there were folks sitting at both windows. I offered to switch with the guy on Dan’s side just to be polite not make him suffer through “baby on board.” Only once we were settled in did the stewardess (no, I won’t dignify her by calling her a flight attendant, you’ll see why) come by to tell us that FAA policy demands that the carseat be placed in the window seat. I said that we hadn’t even booked the window and I’d rather sit in my assigned aisle seat if that was the case. But she said that, no, it didn’t matter that we hadn’t booked a window; someone would have to switch with us. (So glad that we upgraded and paid extra for the aisle seats with legroom and then were so considerate of our neighbors.) Apparently the carseat in the middle seat blocks the row and the person at the window can’t get out (despite the fact that I walked to my seat on the other side of the carseat without removing it. Hmmm…).

This same stewardess was “helping” a late arrival find a place for her carry-on. And rather than physically lifting the older woman’s bag, she raised her voice and said, “will someone help put this bag up?” I’m all for helping other people and being a friendly neighbor in general, but the stewardess was right there next to the woman. And, um, I don’t remember getting paid to work on this flight — quite the opposite. The old lady looked flustered (or pissed, I’m not sure) and heaved her own bag up (though two gentleman seated nearby did make the effort to help).

De-boarding was just as fun. Dan rushed Joe to the bathroom for a needed diaper change while I waited for our gate-checked stroller. Two employees in the jetway rudely asked me to move out of the way of the door where the gate-checked bags arrive. I complied, sort of, just to avoid a scene. (By this time, I was in a splendid mood and figured it was better to avoid an all-out brawl.)

When the stroller finally arrived, these two guys had to move away from the door, so I stood right there in the middle of the jetway blocking them from whatever important duty they had (I think they were waiting for the plane to de-board). I calmly removed the stroller from the bag, opened the stroller, folded the bag, packed it in the stroller compartment, and eventually went on my way. They were mightily irked, but I was oddly satisfied that I stood my ground.

Way to go United. Treat those of us already frazzled from getting the kids to the airport like we’re second class citizens. Getting us adults all bent out of shape really helps us to have patience with our cranky kids. And that really does wonders for their moods too. A great flight experience for everyone on board, no doubt. Next time, we’re flying Southwest.

Dan is bound and determined to figure out all of our camera’s functions. (Me, I prefer that “auto” button!) Every now and then, he nails it. Dan loves playing with light and has a good eye for it. This is Joe on photo day last Friday. He was pretty tired of taking pictures, so no smiles, but it’s an interesting study in light. See more photos from that day here.

Those of you familiar with our wedding photography disaster might know that I’m a bit camera shy when it comes to professional photographers. That’s why we invested in a decent digital SLR and have been taking candid shots of Joe all this time instead of hauling him to a photography studio every month like normal families. But I was feeling kind of guilty for relying on our very amateur skills now that Joe’s approaching his first birthday. So, I thought it might be a good idea to suck it up and take Joe in for a photo shoot.

We found out about a great program, Celebrating Adoption, where newly adoptive parents can schedule a free session with a professional photographer. I checked it out, found a local participating photographer, and made an appointment. Friday was the big day.

Overall, it was a fun shoot even if it was during Joe’s nap time (duh) so that he wasn’t his usual playful and happy self. In all fairness, he may have been feeling icky given that he has had the stomach flu (and been miserable) for the past few days.

I really liked the photographer, Tanya, and her work, which you can check out here. She’s quite good and, if we could afford it, we’d use her again. I’m just not sure that we’ll get what we were expecting from this recent session since our adorable little Joe was being stubborn…plus there was some miscommunication about how it would all play out.

I had prepared for and was expecting a few clothing changes, but apparently I was supposed to say something ahead of time. (I thought it was a given, hence the miscommunication.) The shoot felt like it went really fast and didn’t last as long as I was expecting it to (maybe because of our uncooperative subject…or his overinvolved mama?). We didn’t get around to any changes since Tanya wasn’t aware that I was planning on that. Then the shoot was over and it was too late. I was really disappointed because I wanted several shots of Joe in different outfits for a coffee table book. I’m not into giant wall prints. Really, who hangs a 20×24 photo of their kid — or anyone — anywhere? Even my Nonie uses smaller photos for her family photo wall, maybe 10×13s or even 8×10s?(OK, OK, no offense intended; some folks with the wall space in a larger home might want the monster prints, but that’s just not our style.)

There are a couple of cute shots from the session on Tanya’s blog. You can click here for a sneak peak. Obviously Joe wasn’t very animated even though the photography is great. (Despite our best efforts acting like fools, we couldn’t get him to break into a smile the entire time.) Fingers crossed that there are versions of him smiling when we view the proofs!

UPDATE (3/19): Tanya called this morning and graciously offered to do another session at no expense, despite the fact that I was the dodo that screwed it all up. We really do love her work so I’m nixing Plan B in the hopes that Joseph will be more cooperative this time. She even offered to include Dan and I in the mix. Guess we’d better all get haircuts and look our best! Coffee table book here we come. Who knows…maybe we’ll all look so good that we will want a giant photo over the mantle. Hmmm???

OK, it’s not so funny, but I needed a title. On his way to an MRI appointment, Dan got into a fender bender (everyone’s ok) that crunched up the front of his truck. (Note: it doesn’t look so bad in this little phone photo, but his truck should be about another 1-1/2 feet longer in the front…the silver bumper should be in front of the black jutting bit of metal/frame.) Long story short, when the light turned green, a pedestrian walked into the intersection just as traffic was starting to accelerate (but Dan couldn’t see this because of the big SUV with tinted windows in front of him) . The woman in the SUV slammed on her brakes so hard that the butt end of the vehicle arched into the air. Dan tried, but couldn’t, stop in time and the rear of her SUV came down on the front his truck. Needless to say, Dan didn’t make it to the MRI. His truck was towed to a body shop and we just found out that there is $6,277.03 of damage to his truck. Not sure about the other guy. Thank goodness for insurance. Sigh. If it’s not one thing, it’s another…

We recently had occasion to buy a new stroller because Joe grew out of his infant seat and our only car stroller was a frame that depended on the infant seat. Without the infant seat, we had no stroller. Thus, a quest was born. Since I don’t do anything without extremely thorough research, I though I’d share my findings with other soon-to-be and new parents, since a few of you read this blog.

The reason we chose the infant seat/frame option in the first place was based on the advice of the Baby Bargains book (which I highly recommend, except for this one issue). It seemed a prudent choice at the time (rushing to the hospital and stopping at a Target in Kansas just before closing). But if I could do it over again with the research in my back pocket, here’s what I would recommend:

Go ahead and buy an infant seat (and plan ahead for the possibility of a convertible car seat**) because the infant seats are just darned handy with carrying handles, snap-in features for strollers and car seat bases. But there’s only one stroller out there worth your time — that won’t break the bank — in my not-so-humble opinion: Peg Perego Pliko P3. Note: if you’re dying to fork over big bucks for a fancy schmancy pram (completely unnecessary and often too bulky to haul around), either buy the Pliko P3 “Pramette” or buy your fancy one used. Despite their popularity, most prams and high-priced strollers are often so inconvenient that you can get them for a fraction of retail on your local Craiglist, usually in mint condition. We did that for the all-terrain Zooper Buddy we keep on the porch for local walks on our rough urban sidewalks ($75 for a $300+ stroller, not bad; and the rain cover, mosquito net, and winter footwarmer were all untouched in original packaging — the previous owner found it too difficult and heavy to schlep around in the car).

The Pliko P3, on the other hand, is a dream. It’s listed for about $329.99 (and up) retail, but can be found much cheaper online, especially if you’re willing to get an older model. We bought a new 2007 model at Livingincomfort for $189 with a coupon and free shipping. (These things are so popular that it was difficult to find a used one on Craigslist for under $150, so we opted to spend a few extra bucks and get a brand-spanking new one.)

The Pliko P3 has many features of the travel systems without the bulk or heft, weighing in at only 16 lbs (though I’d swear that mine weighs less). It will accept Peg Perego infant seats (not sure of the brands, check with the manufacturer). It offers height-adjustable handles (essential for anyone over 5′6″) and a one-hand close. It folds down like an umbrella stroller (lengthwise) to easily fit in most trunks without taking up a lot of space. Best of all, it’s comfortable for your little one, with plenty of adjustments and a near flat recline for infants. My favorite feature is the unique harness that unhitches at the top of the back, allowing your little one to lean forward and see the world around him while still remaining safely buckled in. And, if you’re a fashion-conscious mom, these Italian-made strollers have fun color/design options that are the sure to please the pickiest diva.

Other must-haves for baby (if you’re not a parent-to-be, consider these for shower gifts):

• BabyBjorn Soft Bib (can’t live without at least one of these once he’s on solids; two is better because you can keep one in his diaper bag for eating out. You’ll toss all the rest!)
• Podee Hands-Free Baby Bottles (originally developed for multiples, it’s a way to feed a baby who can’t hold his own bottle. GREAT for long car trips or even just shopping trips.)
• Basic Comfort Ultimate Crib Sheet (quick change sheet, mattress pad, super absorbent pad, and waterproof pad in one product). We actually bought one crib sheet and four of these. They’re awesome, easy to change (no lifting up the mattress) and they’ll hold up to four cups of liquid. I wouldn’t even consider a regular sheet after using one of these.
• Halo Sleepsacks. A great wearable blanket to keep little ones safe and warm. Get these in all sizes and materials (fleece, microfleece, thin cotton) appropriate to the season. They even make footed versions for early walkers.
• Born Free bottles and sippy cups made from bisphenol-A-free plastic (or glass).

**When your under-one-year-old grows out of his infant seat, you’ll have to buy a more expensive “convertible” carseat (because he’s too young for a front-facing seat). We chose the Britax Decathlon for safety and features. The same online-shopping strategies apply, though we ended up finding the best deal on ebay. By planning ahead, you could probably find a great deal.

Yesterday I got a letter in the mail. Joseph was declined enrollment for individual insurance coverage because of an ear infection. An ear infection. He’s otherwise absurdly healthy. But they won’t insure him. No higher rate, no rider, no pre-existing condition waiting period, just a letter declining enrollment. The irony is that I had applied for a high-deductible policy. So even though we would be liable for the first $3,000 of his healthcare costs (and up to $10,000 out of pocket), Anthem (Blue Cross & Blue Shield) of Colorado claimed that the risks were too high for them to cover our son because he had a bleepin’ ear infection. We can apply again once his “condition” is in the clear for at least 60 days, but he needs coverage before that.

I received two of these letters recently too. Anthem declined me automatically, no negotiation, because I had been through fertility testing in the past five years. Testing, not treatment. It didn’t matter what the diagnosis was. It didn’t matter that, in Colorado, no individual insurance covers pregnancy expenses (except high-risk coverage), so there is no way to “upgrade” policies to include maternity coverage after acceptance. I was also declined by Kaiser, simply because I had been to the doctor more than twice in the past 12 months (I broke my foot last year and had three or four follow-up visits).

You see, I’m losing my benefits as of May 1st, so I had applied for individual coverage for both Joe and myself. But with this turn of events, Joe and I are now left with three lousy options. Cobra coverage (~$1000/month, low deductible), Dan’s group policy (~$800/month, high deductible), or CoverColorado (~$500/month, high deductible), a “high risk” plan for people with pre-existing conditions. I don’t know about you, but these are incredibly high rates for the average family, especially considering the high deductibles and the fact that these rates are only for two of us. (Thankfully Dan’s health coverage is included in his benefits package).

Our story isn’t unique. I’ve heard about similar experiences from friends and family. And I’ve met several people without health insurance as well as other families and small business owners who opt only for major medical coverage. I’ll never forget the struggle, guilt, and anguish a friend of ours had after her toddler got a deepish cut on his forehead. She knew that he was ok (the fall wasn’t hard) but that the cut would heal better with stitches. Yet she hesitated taking him to the emergency room (of course it happened on a weekend evening) because the expense would be completely out-of-pocket. They were struggling to start a family business and had already borrowed again their credit cards. So they opted not to take him to the doctor. In the end, he was fine and the cut healed, but it did leave a scar, both on his face and with his parents. It was a huge wake-up call for the family, who now realized that every sniffle, sneeze, and boo boo — which under “normal” (group health coverage) circumstances might generate a trip to the family doctor — could now bring about the same financial dilemma.

Don’t fool yourself and think that it couldn’t happen to you. Especially in this economic downturn, people from all walks of life are losing their jobs, and with that, group health coverage. Some folks’ employers are passing along the increasing costs and others, like myself, are simply losing benefits and must turn to individual coverage. At the same time, insurance companies seem to seek out the tiniest excuse to decline enrollment, limit coverage, or increase premiums. This isn’t just an issue for seniors on fixed incomes or the sick or poor. This is a crisis that can affect anyone and, I suspect, will hit the middle class pretty hard in the next few years, especially if the economy doesn’t turn around quickly. It might not be an issue you have to face now, but you never know. That’s something to think about when November rolls around.

Joe’s whining and crying and all-around fussiness hasn’t waned in the past few days. Just in case, I took Joe into Dr. Rich again today to make sure the ear infection was healing and that his discomfort wasn’t the cause of these mood swings (though I was secretly hoping for an easy, clear-cut answer). Thankfully, Joe’s ears are in good shape. Unfortunately, that means his moodiness is most likely related to various developmental issues, and that he’s feeling mighty attached to mommy these days because of it (but he still loves getting attention from daddy too). Sometimes the kid cries if we’re not making eye contact. He’s also showing signs of stranger anxiety, which is normal and probably a good thing, even if it means that doctor visits involve me holding a crying baby in my lap. Dr. Rich assured me that it only gets worse at the 12- and 15- month appointments. Goodie.

We actually love Dr. Rich and the other doctors we’ve met at Joe’s pediatric group. They’re awesome, in fact. Not only are they great with kids of all ages and not too far away, but they’re great to us too (barring the fact that the front office staff is always on the phone — good when we’re calling in, bad when we’re waiting to check in). His new pediatricians are much better than his doctors at the old facility. But, we’re not sure if great doctors are enough to keep us there for the long haul. What’s the problem, you ask?

We made a commitment to ourselves and Joe that we would do our best not only to provide him with the best care we could, but also to surround him with people, including professionals, of color. (And not just the doctors and dentists he uses, but the professionals we see as a family.) He needs good role models that look like him. That can’t happen in the current situation since our pediatric group is about as white-bread as you get. So, we’re on a quest to find a new great pediatric group or family doctor in or close to our neighborhood.

This won’t be the first time we have to address this issue. Schools, churches, social groups, you name it, we’ll have to challenge ourselves to do what’s in Joe’s best interest and that might mean leaving our comfort zone, often and in unexpected ways. It’s been a struggle for us so far. Making this concerted effort requires dedicating more time and energy to things that would normally be second-nature for us. We’ve known that all along, but it’s much easier in theory than practice. We are making strides…well, baby steps. Our first accomplishment was choosing our neighborhood, which is awesome as well as diverse on many levels. Next, we may seek out a local adoption support group so that we can at least occasionally surround ourselves with other folks dealing with similar issues.

Since folks keep asking, thought I’d post a quick update. Dan’s initial back injury is much improved (you saw evidence he was up and about and even painting), but he’s been having trouble with a nerve in his leg (related to the injury), causing him a lot of pain. His doctor (as of today) suspects a herniated disc and wants to do an MRI. Dan’s decided to do another round of physical therapy first. He also got in trouble with his doctor for “working on the house” in this condition, especially when Dan admitted that “not much” lifting could mean 50 or 60 pounds. Dan was forbidden from painting or laying floors or doing any home remodeling, so the rest of the basement will have to wait. I can probably paint the walls and do some trim work, but we won’t make much progress after that until Dan’s back situation is resolved.

Our day in court is coming up and then the adoption will be officially finalized. Woo HOO! Please join us as we celebrate Joe’s first “Gotcha Day” party!

What: Joe’s “Gotcha” Day Celebration (yummies provided)
When: Saturday, April 26th
Time: 3:00pm - 6:00pm
Where: Our new house!
RSVP: Click here to send an email or call us on our home phone
What to bring: Yourself/your family. Side dishes welcome, but not necessary.

p.s. It doesn’t look like our guest quarters will be ready by then, but we’re happy to recommend local hotels for out-of-towners.

Debbie came out for a visit this past weekend and brought some warm California weather with her. It was in the 70s on Saturday (bliss!) and felt (and looked) like spring. Then, in typical Colorado fashion, by the early hours of Sunday morning, we had a good snowfall and a low of 22 degrees. (This is the cherry tree in our backyard about 18 hours after a high of 73 degrees.)

As usual, Deb was incredibly helpful and took care of Joe the entire time. She even stayed in his room and dealt with him in the middle of the night, which means that she didn’t get much rest. (I’m not sure if he’s teething or if this ear infection is resistant to the new antibiotics, but he’s been abnormally fussy at night, getting up about every hour.)

Having Deb here left Dan and I free to work on the house. We rented an airless sprayer and Dan (resplendent in his disposable snow-camouflage Oompa-Loompa stylings) primed the basement and painted the ceilings. Now we just have to roll the walls. We’re hoping to get to it next weekend. Slowly but surely, we’re getting there!

Since Grandma* Debbie left, Joe’s been exhibiting some new behaviors, namely temper tantrums every time I leave the room, turn my back, or try to put him to bed. It’s the typical tantrum: bloodcurdling screams, hysterical crying, and he’s even started the back arching. Oh joy. I’m hoping it’s a combination of a disrupted schedule and being sick. If not, well, we’re prepared for anything…especially since G-ma and Noni P are headed out here tomorrow!

*I’m not wild about the name “Grandma” Debbie. She’s young (only 11 years older than me, for goodness sake), hip, fit, and needs a more representative moniker than “grandma.” I’m sure Joe will come up with something on his own, but it never hurts to have ideas. Got any?

Joe turned 9 months old yesterday. This morning, we all tromped out to the pediatrician’s office for his well-baby visit. They did a toe prick to test for anemia (negative), gave him a catch-up vaccine he should have had at six months. (Not sure why the old doctor didn’t give it, though we were informed by the new doctor that there was a national shortage, so maybe that’s why?)

The doctor gave him the once-over and decided that the ear infection from last month never healed (that explains his continual fussiness and rough sleeping patterns that we had attributed to teething), so now Joe is on a souped up antibiotic (rats). We have to give him plenty of yoghurt during the course of the treatment.

On the growth front, Joe is now in the 45th percentile across the board. He weighed in at 20 lbs and .5 ozs (granted he did have a bottle right before the appointment), but he’s still at 28 inches, so no height spurt (yet?).

On the developmental front, the doctor was quite pleased with his strength, attentiveness, fine and gross motor skills, and verbal advancement. Joe also crawled on all fours (not the army crawl) in the doctor’s office. That’s the first time we’ve seen him actually go some distance, though I suspect his motivation might have had something to do with the fact that he was only wearing a diaper and the commercial carpet was scratchy; he was trying to get to daddy.

Not even nine months old and our little man is on his fourth haircut! The Weed may not be growing in girth, but his hair sure isn’t slowing down.

Now, before you get your panties in a wad, please understand that Joe’s curls were already butchered by yours truly during Joe’s third haircut, so Dan had to take matters — or at least the clippers — into his own hands.

Joe’s silky soft curly locks on the top were pretty much gone after the last haircut (they were kind of half-curls and nowhere close to even). The shorter we cut his hair, the coarser it gets. Not much of a surprise, but those half-curls were kind of hard to manage and his hair always looked messy — especially since, in this winter weather, Joe wears a lot of hats outside (and we take them off inside).

So, this time, Dan decided to try a fade and leave just a little on top. It actually looks pretty cute. Joe is definitely starting to look more like a little boy rather than a little baby. Sigh, they grow up so fast!

Joe didn’t want to go to bed tonight at the regular time and was really wound up. He had been fussy all day with the new tooth. We put him down anyhow. Gotta stick to that routine, right?

I knew he was still awake, but figured that he’d fall asleep in a dark room. At first, Joe was fairly quiet, but then I heard a couple of bangs like something had fallen. So I poked my head in the door to find him like this.

Joe can’t even really crawl well yet, but the little turkey had hoisted himself up to his feet (despite the fact that the sleepsack he’s wearing has no legs), reached over the crib, and knocked a bunch of things onto the floor. As soon as he saw me, he gave a devilish little grin and started “jumping” up and down in excitement.

Dan says that maybe this little outburst is simply retribution for making Joe wear the $5 deep discount pink sleepsack every night. Hmph!

Joe cut a tooth today. We couldn’t get a photo of the tooth in question, but it has been so long in coming. And it explains some of the extra fussiness.

…your idea of a really romantic Valentine’s Day means sharing a homemade pizza and sitting on the bed watching Lost while the baby is in the bouncer eating Cheerios. Hey, at least we shaped the pizza into a heart (sort of)! I guess that time Dan spent working at Pizza Hut in college paid off. He he.

Dan and I celebrated our 9th Valentine’s Day together last night. I bought (gasp!) him a card (nope, didn’t make it) . He checked out a library book on Valentine’s Day for me to read. Ahhhh…

No sooner did I write the last post than Joe and I came down with some other cold…lots of congestion and a deep cough. Rats. At least Joe is in relatively good spirits despite the symptoms. Let’s just hope we avoid another ear infection!

It’s been far too long since we’ve posted a blog entry. So, here’s the rundown of the last three months of life with the Lawrences.

Christmas in the Mountains. My family planned a last-minute vacation to the Rocky Mountains. Dad, Deb, four siblings, and Nonie flew out and met us at a cabin in Winter Park. I’ve been moaning about having a white Christmas tucked away in a cabin for years…since I was a teenager, and this year, I got my wish. You don’t know how BIG this is, since my family is all about tradition, and tradition with the Nuttalls means Christmas morning at Dad’s house with Nonie there, then we nap, then we go to Aunt Marlane’s house for dinner. It’s been that way…well, as long as I can remember. (Of course, I’ve been the black sheep for missing the occasional Christmas.) So we stayed in the mountains and it snowed, brilliantly. I relished in the quietude of the cabin for 4 days; Dan, Billy, and Daniel went snowboarding; it was Dan’s first time and he came back a bit tender. All of the kids (and Dad) went tubing on the last day. Fun! Joe loved the snow and got to wear his uber cute snow suit (thanks Plo!).

The Move. As soon as Christmas was over, we hustled back home to prepare for the move (the next day). But, we have a knack for poor planning when it comes to moves. We had a blizzard on our scheduled move date, so that threw life into a tizzy. Not to mention that we weren’t anywhere close to packed and the new house wasn’t ready to move into. The movers came a few days later. We still weren’t very ready. Dan’s bruised tailbone was bugging him too. We managed to get our bedroom and Joe’s room set up, but we were up to our eyeballs (literally) with boxes in the living room and dining room. We went back on the 31st to clear out the dregs of our stuff. Thank goodness we had a Uhaul trailer because it, the truck, and my car were full to the brim. We caravaned home like the Beverly Hillbillys and barely made it to the new house to see the ball drop. I definitely don’t recommended moving in the winter with an infant.

Visit with the G-mas. Right after we moved, Dan’s mom (Germom) and grandma (Noni P) came out for a visit for a few days. Really, they were here to look at assisted living homes for Noni P. We looked at a few and managed to squeeze in an evening at Zoo Lights, which is really cool (the zoo is entirely lit with colored lights). Good news: Noni P is moving out here! She’s working on selling her properties and relocating. We’re so excited to have her close by!

Health Setbacks. The day Germom and Noni P left, Dan threw out his back…badly. We went to urgent care the next day. They medicated him and told him to rest for a few days. Well, a few days later, Dan felt better, bent over to pick up something off the ground, and –wham!– he completely threw out his back. We got him to bed and there he stayed for about a week. He wasn’t much improved for a couple of weeks after that. It was rough. He’s been going to physically therapy and is now back at work, but he’s not supposed to bend or lift anything (not even Joe). In the middle of all of that, both Joe and I got really sick with the “4 week” virus that’s been going around. It lasted two solid weeks, then lingered. Joe also got an ear infection. He’s better now; so am I. We’re not sure about Dan, who might be coming down with something right now.

The House, Unpacking, and Remodeling. Well, all of the above set us back with the house. After a few weeks, I finally unpacked what I could and got all boxes into the dining room, so that at least the living room was set up. Thankfully our neighbors (angels that they are) had helped us paint. No, they painted, most of the rooms in our house before we moved in. We just have the mud room, the hallway, the sun room, the living room, and all the trim to do. At my dad’s urging, we hired someone to frame and drywall the basement. We probably couldn’t have managed it on our own even in stellar health, so that was a good call. It’s taken longer than expected, partly because we weren’t able to do all the prep work we had planned before hiring the job out, so the drywall guy has had to do a lot of our work (like moving a bunch of junk out of the basement, finishing projects we had started, and dealing with all the quirks and mysteries of a 90-year-old house). But that, along with other projects (plumbing, roof, appliances, etc.) drained our budget, so the remodel is coming to somewhat of a screeching halt…very soon. The drywall is a day or so away from being finished, then we can paint. We can probably do the trim, too, but the bathroom and floors downstairs will have to wait. Ditto with the kitchen and the major wood/room divider project in the entryway. Not to mention that Dan can’t really do much. His tools are in Greeley and he can’t load or unload them given his back situation. I’ve been trying to do little things, mostly electrical, when I can. Dan’s been doing some of that too, but there’s only so much we can do at the moment.

Joe’s New Playmate. My work situation is in flux and I knew I was losing my bennies, so we found a family with whom we could share nanny costs. That started in January. The socialization is great for Joe, even if the 11-month-old girl he’s in daycare with kind of bullies him around and steals his binky and toys. Ha! I figure they’ll work it out on their own. Unfortunately, the other family needs more hours than the nanny can’t provide, so we got two weeks of notice this past weekend and we’re frantically looking for a new family to share nanny costs. So far, no luck because the hours are a bit weird (I only work about 15+ hours a week with the cutbacks). Keep your fingers crossed for us!

The Weed in General. Thankfully, Joe’s slowing down in the growth department. He’s 28 inches long and still just 18 pounds, 11-3/4 ounces (as of January 31st). The 12-month clothes fit perfectly even if we have a hard time finding big (wide) enough socks and shoes for his little Flintstone feet (he’s between a size 3 and size 4 in toddler shoes). Joe’s really close to being fully mobile. He’s almost crawling…definitely scooting and rolling to get to a desired destination. He’s pulling himself up to a sitting or kneeling position (we had to lower his crib). I also just ordered a slew of gates to install around the house and we’re frantically trying to childproof everything before the little guy really gets mobile. I think we have a week or so. The extra physical activity is probably keeping him stable, if not slimming him down a bit. We’ve also finally got Joe on a schedule both for feeding (three meals a day plus bottles) and sleeping in his crib — in his room — at night. But between the cold, the ear infection, and teething (but none have broken through yet), he’s a bit fussy at night and only sleeps in 4-hour stretches…after a diaper change, new binky, or sometimes a bottle, he goes right back down. So far, the transition has been relatively easy….certainly easier than I expected.

Progress on the Adoption. Several folks have asked if it’s “official” yet, so thought I’d set the record straight. We should have finalized in late November or early December, but that didn’t happen because of several delays (I won’t go into the blame game this time). But no worries, just an annoyance. In mid-January, our social worker came over for another visit (she had to update our homestudy because of the new house, and we had to sign some documents requesting a court date). She submitted the court documents and we finally got our date: